feeling closer to you :)

i think we are getting closer but i had a feeling that we are far apart . . .

Hey , sorry for the late post . . .

Yesterday i duty so didn't upload my blog

and he say he will find me . . .

but i waited and he never came . . .

and for Tuesday i stay back at school , for the practice dance steps

TWO WEEKS & 2 day

two weeks & 2 day to "Installation Day"

worried but still at the same time relax

you know what . . . its been days i didn't text him already

is because his phone has no credit and thats why 

missing him badly

texting him is like a routine to me

cancelled this routine 

makes my life so "empty" 

 i miss him badly . . .

but these days he came to look for me , i think . . .

or maybe is am thinking to much

is because 

yesterday he went walking around and pass my class 

two times , knock on the window for two times 

and today he took the "keluar" pass

and walk pass my class

i saw him looking into my class 

through the window beside my place 

i saw him ><

but i pretend that i didn't notice

then after a few minutes  

i went out to pass up the maths exercise book 

i'm the maths " ajk "

i went out ,look around. .  didn't saw him 

thought he had went back class

then i came out of the office and saw him walking pass my class again

then this time i pretend i didn't see him

then he called out " stupid " 

i turn and reply 

" why u call me stupid ? i so *smart* "

i saw him hiding his smile

he's so cute

:D

then i saw him went back class 

. . .

miss the routine , miss his text message , miss his smile

>< 

just wish he would text me 

HOPE

okies , got to rush my homework and thats all 

ANNYEONG 

:D

unlucky ? lucky ?

what can i do to let him go ? to erase him from my thoughts . . . i found out there isn't a way . . .

Well today i saw him twice . . . NICE

and yesterday I'm sooo in a good mood :)

well secret . . . i won't tell

but i laugh all night when i think about it 

hahaha 

until now i still will laugh

LOL
Today first saw him was at parking lot
 when we going down to canteen
and then this car coming up so we stop and
 i didn't notice him behind me
 and he pull me hair . . .
then i turn back see that is him
he smile so wickedly but very adorable
then second time is when i went to 7-eleven
to buy sweets
(you know me , i can't live without candy in my life)
then i think is too hot
my head very very dizzy
when i went in
i didn't notice he was there also
then he say " OI " 
and i look up *with a very blur face*
then went to the drinks section
took a drink because is SO hot outside
 wanted to pay for it then i remember the sweet 
then i walk back turn around saw that he had left
then i continue walk to the sweets section there
then my head suddenly very very very dizzy 
and the next thing i know is i fainted
but actually pull by this lady
thanks to her 
if not i will be laying on the floor ><
so embarrassed
lucky that he has gone 
if not i don't know what to do
. . .
my head is now still very very pain
. . .
Oh and one week to "merentas desa"
and i had already sell most of my coupon
for drinks when merentas desa that day :)
why i sell ?
is because i am a librarian 
and librarian sell drinks that day
so i need to sell coupon . . .
Don't know why i am so down 
is maybe he never text me . . .
waiting for his message
stupid Clare 
that's what most people say 
but well i am stupid ><
doesn't matter in love or study 
i am stupid
i admit
well gotta upload some songs then do homework
because tonight got tuition
annoying subject . . .
but still have to go
too bad 
ANNYEONG 
:D

i can't take it anymore

I really want to cry out loud . . .

but

all i can do is show u a smile

saying " i m OK "

but in the end 

i cries when no ones around

i don't want to show

and i won't

I AM REALLY TIRED 

let me go please 

*talking to parents

i wish i could talk like that in front of my parents

but no

never 

i will swallow the pain inside of me 

yes i can 

because i am Clare

. . .  

focus is all i need

must focus on study >< PMR weh . . .

Wake up Clare !! these days so down man . . .

don't know how to do

teach me what to do ><

report card come back already

my mom ask and i say " i don't know "

in class i get number 4 . . . .. 

. . . . .. . . . . . . . .. . . . . . 

from the back TT 

i want to cry already

yup i fail 2 subject

and i get number 4 from the last

WTF

i hide my report card in my locker 

in case my mom ask  

i can say i left in my locker forget to bring back . . .

yup that's what i am going to say . . .

MY RESULT SUCK 

so i need to concentrate in my studies
don't keep think about him ><
i decide to forget him
because i think is important
for me to concentrate more in studies more than relationship
after exam i can always continue miss him
but if miss him miss until sot already 
then exam fail i will regret so badly
so i decided and this is final :)
so gonna go pack some stuff and study 
wish me LUCK !! 
ANNYEONG

where are you ?

i miss you so badly . . . where are you ?

? upload just for fun

I had been looking every where for you 

where did u hide to ?

i miss you so badly 

Yesterday , text with him again :)

but i got tuition :(

but we text right after my tuition 

it was creepy yesterday . . .

really creepy 

is because i was waiting for my mom

and while waiting i was texting him

then suddenly the light close 

e_e

so creepy then there i some Indian crazy guy

i think drunk = =

sing some stupid Indian song  F@#K 

so noisy man

lucky i stand far away :)

but still dark that time no light 

all the light came from is from my phone 

not even a street light is on

Then he at this time tell those creepy thighs o 

even tell ghost story ><

i was acting like i am not scared

but i WAS

its so scary :( 

then we text and text and text 

until 11 something he slept 

leaving me alone :(

plus i am those who doesn't sleep so early

so i kept staring at my phone and hope he or someone would just

message ME !! but NO not even one 

they abandon me :(

so i slept at 2++ 

its early ><

Then woke up this morning 

look out of the window 

its raining ><

shit . . .

but i like it when its raining

just so cold and relaxing 

but i had to go to school :(

nearly late today

lucky i rush to my locker and take some stuff 

and throw my phone inside :D 

then went to study 

blah blah blah 

never saw him today

miss him badly

just want to see him and that's all

don't dare to talk to him

because i don't know what to say . . . 
* speechless*
okay upload until here
hope he message me today :)
HOPE 
ANNYEONG

i love you so freaking much ♥

music all over my head , every song makes me think of you ♥

YOU had no idea how much u had me gone CRAZY

crazy but you , crazy waiting for your reply

crazy missing you

crazy looking for you

JUST CRAZY

yesterday , we text again ><

That time i was watching " Black Swan "

the story about this ballerina  

giving herself pressure and slowly going crazy

well is creepy you know ><

i was ironing my school white cloths that time

so i watch abit and some scary part i just ignore it

just ironing my cloths

Then my phone rang it was "vanilla twilight"

very soft sound , i set as message tone

i was very down that time no idea why

then this message came

it cheer me up :)

it was from him ><

We text and text and text and TEXT

i was SO happy

that i iron my cloths smiling away ~

:D

and they thought i was crazy

NEH i don't care because i am HAPPY

^^

i was so down before that , so i text Natalie

looks like she had the same problem before

and one advice

" never go crazy over a dude , it just ended up hurting yourself "

yup , that's the advice but for me i can't take it

i am crazy over him ><

YEAH MAN

Today school reopen >< shit HOMEWORK 

i haven't do the homework that was suppose 

to pass up TODAY and i will do now . . .

will pass up tomorrow

now headache

maybe will get some sleep 

then tonight got tuition again 

annoying subject

Slept late last night , about 2.15 he slept 

and i slept at 3++ going to be 4

now headache but its worth it ><

ANYEONG

i can't erase you from my life

i try to delete you from my mind but you are like a gum stick to my mind . . .

                                     Yup is this photo that alot of them like
                                                                                          If you haven't like then go facebook and like

Yesterday i was so bored so i just take my phone and start message some friends

accidentally i message him , and he REPLY :)

OMG

i was so freaking happy

we chat like never before , till then he say he very lc

he say "ilc"

and i say yup you very very very LC

then he ask me whether i know what does it means

i said Lan C

then a "nonono" came back

then i ask him what does it means

he don't want to tell

keep say no . . .

then i ask him to give me a hint or a clue . . .

then 1st he say no , but then he gave me this

" - ---- ----- --- "

ask me to fill in the blanks

then i see see , but still don't know

then something came to my mind

" i love Clare teh"

OMO , i really hope is that what he means but NO

i think too much

then it came out to be

" i lans ciiii lol "

he is just fooling around

to bad . .  TT

we chat till 12 i think

i keep thinking bout him all night

till 5 then i am tired

i fell asleep

Then i know why all this while he didn't online

is because his computer broke down

that's why

But this morning i online i saw he comment on my photo

and even like it :)

WEE

i am in heaven

but i don't understand what he wrote

neh don't think about it Clare

For the first time my photo has been like over 40+

THANK YOU ALL

i am sooo happy :)

I LOVE YOU ALL SO MUCH

Gonna take a sip of coffee to clear my mind

alittle headache

Didn't sleep well last night

too happy to sleep

okay gotta go

ANNYEONG

ShoppING ? :) YESS ♥

where had you been ? missing you badly . . . please be safe >< i pray . . .

                                             Beastly kills >< NICE

 Its been days seeing him not online and not replying my message

where had you been ? 
out station perhaps ?

Well four more days to reopen school , and well i love friends
 hate school

but this is life . . . not gonna change it :)
 its NATURAL

washed my bag , later pack my books then oh wash my shoe

and worse of all wash my DOG

spending 20min+ in ONE dog and by the way i have TWO dog !!

waste all my time away . . . haizzz

so much for dogs . . .

Well went to watch Beastly yesterday

its sooo AWESOME !!!

So charming in a way that can kill by looks

one word 

NICE !!!

Gonna spread my blog around , and i have this blog since last year

but didn''t let anyone know , and now i am going to call for more visitors :)

well if you visit my blog mind asking some friends to visit too ??

thank you so much ><

BEASTLY kills ><
 its so god damn nice to watch

SO charming

oh and others than watching movie 

its been a long time since i been shopping with my mom

so yeah we shop yesterday

from MID VALLEY to TIMES SQUARE 

nice

but buying not much things so 

yeah 

Gonna do some stuff  and maybe upload

some new songs ??

my play list had been very old

maybe some of you came in my blog also can't hear any songs

so yeah gotta change it

till then BYE

ANNYEONG ♥

crazy over you ♥

you had no idea how much you had me gone crazy over you . . . but . . . : ( :



Message him yesterday , chat but random things but seem like we always late reply each other

 i fall asleep when he message me back 

is because yesterday in takewando class that time  

our "sir" torture us . . . now my muscle pain like hell can't even walk right

sit right , or lay down right . . .
 so tired

If i know this will happen i wouldn't go . . . 
ishh soo pain

Yesterday he message me 3 message :)

but i fell asleep ,
 i never see it

and when i woke up and i saw my phone , i was sooo freaking happy :)

firstly i type back as fast as i can 

hopeing he will reply me but until now he haven't reply me yet 

i keep every message he reply me . . . 

and the last message was

" when a boy faces a lengluii he will become weird "

i have no idea what that means

but i like it > <

don't know why . . . until now not even a reply

normally if he didn't reply me, at night he also will send a " good night "

but yesterday i waited , wait until i fall asleep

it was 3 when i sleep , i know he wouldn't message at this time

but i waited for him , i waited

until this morning i woke up i still reach for my phone but no message

on facebook he isn't online

where had he been ? T.T

I call my aunt yesterday to ask about hows Japan

well shes in Osaka and the incident happen in Tokyo
 THANK GOD

but she say there is little shaky , but she say that's normal

please be safe ,
 i pray for japan and every one out there

ANNYEONG :)

just let go , and force a smile out ♥

i will keep smiling and say I'm alright . . . i will let go our memories


                                             

                  Message him today , just a few message then he never reply me already

he just left me there waiting like a idiot looking at the phone hoping he would reply me

what a fool am i , but i still waited

till now he havent reply me yet , seeing him online at Facebook but don't dare to find him to chat

scare he say me annoying or say me noisy

just hope he will find me chat first , just hope

I just don't know , i think he hates me or am i really that annoying ?

ahh never mind , 
i am just going to delete his number and not messaging him anymore 

that's what i am going to do and there is one week for me to forget him

just let go Clare , i will let go

just give me time , that is all i ask

Well to be honest , i haven't have a clue about how to spend my holidays 
but there is only one week , what can i do ?
If you ask my mom , 
she will sure say "of course STUDY , revision for the subject that you are week on"
blah blah blah
 yeah i know whatever 
"i have my plans MOM " yup that's how i reply her but in my mind i have no idea
just see how things goes by
but i think there will be some going back school things is because library will have some things going on
well maybe going "pasar malam" today hope it doesn't rains
enjoy your holiday ><
annyeong

enjoy your holidays :)

 I don't know where he is . . . i miss him T.T but i still smile INCASE  i see him

                                                       

      Its just so weird , is like the first time i been on stage NOT nervous 

OK its sooo weird , 
and some more i stand in front row lerh 

and not being nervous , 
well i just forget *some* steps and just dance 
blah blah blah 

being so high today , Friends keep ask me to pose and they take pic lol weird

but we had fun :)

just wish you are here CB Mun . . . 
and oh CB mun WE WON !! :)

number 2 for English and 2 for BM

weeeeeeeeee

And its like a party well we beat 3P in i don't know English or BM so is like um draw ><

well , 
just being high today and being follow by *paparazzi* that's what i call them

is because they keep taking my photo and ask me to pose = =

but i had fun doing that ><

TODAY IS THE LAST DAY OF SCHOOL !! 
YEAH BABY

One week of holiday . . . so happy :)
 but i am gonna miss him soo much

and homework stack up like mountain , 
plus tuition not cancelling still need to go 
WTF

I miss him , yesterday i miss the chance to watch him sing

and i enjoy talking to him yesterday

but today i never see him some more facebook loading so lag ><

just want to talk to him . . . 
that's all

Have no plans for this holiday just see larh if can i go out if cannot then i stay at home

online or watch TV or get some sleep :)

But i want to go out lerh , maybe go out with some old friend i think ?

Maybe

OK upload until here :) and oh HAPPY HOLIDAY enjoy

annyeong :)

hwaiting 3Q ♥

Love. . . is not visible but valuable . . . i love you . . .

                                                               

                   CLARE's UP >< Tomorrow is Friday and its last day of school till school holiday . . . ishh i want to go out lerh , go times square , buy cloths buy new bag :) Can't wait till tomorrow ,
 becausebtomorrow is English week !! 
Wearing Domo t-shirt tomorrow , with grey lens and skinny jeans

and maybe a glasses that look like Justin bieber wear de or dalang like that de

Hwaiting o 3Q ,
 haizz too bad sook mun tomorrow cannot go because she had to rush for KLIA ,

rush to Beijing sooo damn good lerh , 
i had to go because i promise sook mun that i will go and then tell her the result . . .

Trust me, i had no confident that we will win . . .

is because we are not dancing much just dance for the Mercy song 
and some action for the Malay song 
and 3P is dancing plus singing , and their dance step is prety nice :))
But still we will try our BEST !! 3Q hwaiting ^^
I will show everything i got , if you let me . . . every talent i got to make us win :)
Just pray we get lucky and just win
   HWAITING 3Q  

annyeong. upload next time :))

i miss him ♥

                                                   

Just wish you here with me , missing you so badly . . .

                                                                 

                                                 Its been days i have not see him ,

 yesterday duty he also never come "program nilam" , 

wait. . . its been days he never come pogram nilam already since FEB . . .    

  Next week is English week so every class need to dance and our class is dancing  

the Justin Bieber "Somebody To LOVE" wee and a "out DATE" song together by HSM 

soo out date!! 

ISHHH then one more song i don't know ,

 because we dont want to dance the HSM song 

so i think they had it into two groups and  

we are BIEBER GROUP !!!! CHEERERS to BIEBER group :) 

haha 

                 Today stay back practice our bieber song , and CB Mun dance until very CUTE 

Clare don't forget the steps o , i think i forget already larh . . . = = 

ihhh trying to remember . . . OH i think i remember liao , haha ok since i remember don't forget . . . nothing much happen this week , just some boring stuff going on . . . :) 

okay gotta go, upload next time 

                         ANNYEONG . FOREVER BELIEBERS